Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
