she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
We talked him into tasing himself.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
I enjoy the company of your penis
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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