I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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