who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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