but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
