We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
