I bet he comes in French.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
