spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
