she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
God, I missed his penis.
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