a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize