She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
