Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Terrible idea I love it
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
