I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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