dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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