better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
