I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Randomize
