Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
