At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
He? As in you personified your dick?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
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