when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
