Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
