question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
