i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize