Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize