Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
