My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
