I only kidnapped one of them. chill
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
