Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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