I'd wear matching sweaters with you
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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