She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
