: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
