Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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