i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
