Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
