Sry I called you an 8
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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