Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
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