What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Randomize
