just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
