but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
