walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize