Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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