you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
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