i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
