i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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