So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
