My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
