I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Randomize
