I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize
