you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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