you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
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