What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
